birthday feels

If my parents weren’t my parents, I would hope to be their friend. Though, I’m certain that they are inherently cooler than I am, so it probably would take some coaxing on my end. 😉

It’s funny getting older and seeing your parents as both your parents and as your friends.

I have a different and distinct relationship with my mom and my dad but the foundation of both is their fierce love for me (and, of course, my love right back).

While neither of them necessarily wear their hearts of their sleeves, they were paired with a baby who is super sensitive, cries at the drop of a dime, and feels deep. I can only guess how it has been for them for the past 27 years… I’m sure there were times when they took a deep breathe, shook their heads, and thought, how is it possible for this babygirl to have all of these feelings? 

The wonderful thing about them though, is that they never tried to squash them. They let me be me and feel and learn and cry. Particularly my mom, who has celebrated my soul and doused it with love.

I’m not huge into celebrating my birthday, mostly because the pressure of the day being *perfect* just stresses me out. However, I do honor birthdays; I honor my day and everyone else’s as a day to be filled with a lot of love and (at least in my case) reflection. Like the fact that I am literally a creation – a combination – of both of my parents. And  I couldn’t be prouder of it.

I hope I’m as funny as my dad and that I’ve inherited his non judgemental ways. He knows how to light up a room, tell the best stories, and connects with all walks of life. Through the years, he’s been my rock. He’s trustworthy and solid. More often than not, it’s him that I call when I need life advice or a good laugh.

I hope to be as generous as my mom. I know her eye color, legs, and hands are already things we share. Her laugh is infectious and she too can play life of the party with ease. I talk to her everyday. I admire her love and perseverance. She’s kind and she shows up. There are times when literally only she can make it better and she does, every single time.

I am happy they are both my parents and my friends. I’m proud to be theirs’ and grateful to call them mine. They aren’t together anymore but they’ve raised be beautifully without a relationship of their own. They are selfless and strong. They are my lift and my soft landing. They are me.

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